The Philippines as seen through Dutch eyes (Part 1)

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When I first came to the Philippines I literally knew nothing about the country. Yes, I have seen and read about the shoes of Imelda Marcos. That was it. So I arrived here completely blank. Thanks to the internet I met this young man with whom I have been chatting for several months until I decided to come over for a 3-week vacation. From the moment we met, it felt like we knew you each other very well and I had a good time. He showed me Baguio and Vigan because those are two of the 'must-see' places for a tourist. But of course, there are more. Several times I told him ”I want to live here” and he said I could. Three months later, in February 2007 I came back. Totally unprepared I must say and yes, at times it was difficult. Back in my home country friends were betting about how long it would take for me to come back. And there was nobody who said, “I guess he’ll be back after 9 years”. That makes me a winner, right?

The first thing I noticed in the Philippines was the scarecrows who were alive! They were sweeping the streets, fully dressed and their T-shirts were covering their heads. Where we stick our neck through the hole they showed their faces through the very same hole. Well, not exactly because the mouths and noses are covered with bandanas, then come the huge sunglasses and then on top are the straw hats as the finishing touch. It might look a bit strange to foreigners but it definitely is the best they can do to protect them from the burning sun. 

In Holland, public transport is good because you can travel to the smallest villages. But all the rules and regulations really are killing it. I remember visiting friends who lived not even that far from my hometown. Buses have a fixed timetable. It was a Sunday afternoon and I was invited to have dinner but they liked me to come early in the afternoon. The clock hit 2 PM when I arrived. I told my hosts to start cooking so that I could fetch the last bus going back at 4.30 PM. Of course, they were going to bring me back home but the fact that buses stop riding in the middle of the day was annoying. Got the last train going back home? You better hope it is not delayed or you will miss the last possible connection. No way will the buses wait an extra 5 minutes. Many times I had to walk from the railway station to my house. I was lucky: only 20 minutes walking. Here in the Philippines, you do not have to be worried. You can always get a jeepney. You just wait for them, flag them down and get in. Well, in the province they don’t ride late in the evening but then you can get a tricycle or use the bigger bus. Those jeepneys are very special and for tall people somewhat inconvenient. You really have to bend over in them finding a place to sit. Then be careful not to bump your head or to step on the feet of other passengers. If you think the jeepney is full of the driver more than likely will not agree and wait for 2 or 3 more passengers. If possible you better pick the best place. If you have to go all the way till the end of the trip you better move as far to the front as possible. In other cases; stay in the back so you don’t have to make a survival trip between all feet and boxes, bags, tires, etc. etc. To stop you simply say “Para po” (“Stop please”) or knock on the roof. Once I heard you better not knock in Manila jeepneys. The driver then will move on saying  “Why do you knock? The door is open already”. During the ride, you more than likely will feel like a canned sardine. My word of advice: When you get out of the jeepney, gently stretch your arms and legs in order to properly unfold them.

Me posing at the side of a 'retired' jeepney in Lopez city, Quezon Province

 Tricycles are real fun. They bring you everywhere for a reasonable fare. That is if they not overcharge you. Sometimes that happens. Once a guy tried to charge me 100 Pesos while the fare should be 30. When I asked for his body number he disappeared faster than lightning. It is just what one should do. In December 2014 I flagged down a tricycle at 9.30 PM. The trip was going to be from the side of a town to the other side and in the daytime that would be around 60 Pesos. Before I got in I asked the driver about the fare and he said it was going to be 60. When I arrived I gave him a note of 100 Pesos and told him to keep the change. “Sir, it's only 60”. “Yes, but I appreciate you for being very honest and it’s almost Christmas time”.  Cabanatuan City in the Province of Nueva Ecija is the tricycle capital of the country although they like to call it even the tricycle capital of the world. The streets are filled with tricycles there. Each town or municipality has its own color combination and the nicest I saw were blue and pink. In Olongapo City, there is a color code for tricycles depending on their route. They are not allowed in each other’s district. 

Shopping is an experience. The first time I went to a Mall a security guard wanted to check my small backpack. He only looked into the big compartment and did not mind about the others. This made me ask my friend what they exactly are checking. He laughed “They don’t even know themselves what they’re looking for!” The bigger stores inside the mall have their own security guards. No, not to check the compartments which the first guard did not check. Malls are usually very noisy. Shops that sell musical instruments have a lot of their merchandise in the bigger hall and everybody can play drums, piano and/or guitar. If the next shop sells movies and music you have the best of both worlds: The musical instruments competing with some videoke. The small stands that you will find on every floor, selling snacks, ice cream or SIM cards, etc. etc. often have something to attract customers. As long as it makes noise it seems to work perfect. There is no fun at all to go to the Mall all alone so you bump into complete families who make it hard for you to pass them. The young kids could not be left alone at home so they too are walking in your way, screaming or crying, all depending on their little moods. You like to go through shops, just to have a look and maybe purchase something? You better be prepared because there will be several employees approaching you, asking you what you want. No matter what you answer, your every step will be followed. In a 3 story department store, I once told a friend “Next time I will glue a carton on my forehead saying ‘Good morning ‘ or ‘good afternoon’ because all employees approach you wishing you good this or that!” I guess that idea was brought here by the Americans. 

Temporary playground at SM Mall Baguio, Benguet

 The best of all, however, are the grocery stores. Do not ever think that once you found, for instance, the coffee that you can expect the creamer and sugar to be nearby. They both might be stored in 2 different places far from each other. The same goes for bread and spreads. Never will you find them close to each other. But hey! If you are lucky there are big signs hanging from the ceiling telling you exactly what you can find there. -As a matter of fact, I had to go to the grocery yesterday afternoon and I guess the employees had a big-time seeing me walking back and forth, back and forth. I simply had forgotten to forget about ‘logical’. And I mean Western logical of course. I am sure there is a system here as well. I only wish that one day I will get to understand it.- And to save the best for last: Paying your groceries. 9 out of 10 times you have to line up. Behind the cash desk is the cashier and also you will find somebody to pack your stuff. Prices are scanned but sometimes –ehhh well, it actually happens quite often- the codes have to be typed manually. The cashier puts all your stuff at the end of the counter where a guy is packing everything. So far no problems. I have to admit that some cashiers work faster than others but no matter what, you will not be able to leave in let’s say 5 to 10 minutes. If a product misses a price tag the green flag goes up. This means you will have to wait until somebody comes to get it and look for the price. Relax; she or he will come back. If you pay cash, the money is counted 2 or maybe 3 times. When you get your change you are not done yet. You get the receipt only after the cashier has signed it and she also has to write down the amount of bags you collected. Now if you pay with a credit card you wish there was a seat where you could order a cup of coffee. You hand the credit card to the cashier who looks at both sides. Then holds it against the light and she might even bite on it. Just to check if your card is real. If it stands the test you can be sure your card is ok! But now comes the hard part: the red flag goes up! Time for the head cashier to show up now. She and she alone is allowed to put your card in the register. Not before it was double-checked of course. With a big smile she then walks out and you think you are done. Wrong! The register is shaking and puffing before it spits out 2 receipts. Kindly sign them both please. You might think that this is the end of the show. Sorry but you are wrong again. For the second time the red flag comes out and there is nothing for you to do but wait until the always friendly smiling head cashier comes back to sign as well. It might be that she wants to see what is in your bags and if the original receipt is right. And since she is busy anyway she might as well have a little talk with the cashier. Behind you the line grows and grows. Just remember how fortunate you are not to be the last one line! And keep smiling please. The head cashier leaves and you stretch your hand so the cashier can return your credit card. Sorry….ahh you already guessed it; wrong! A big note book comes from under the desk and the cashier goes through it until the last line. Then she writes the date and her name before asking you to kindly put your signature over printed name. Now you can count your blessings. You are free to go wherever you want. I guess it is time to relax over a cup of coffee now! 

There really is more I would love to write but let’s save that for another blog. I hope nobody got upset here. Remember it was all said with tongue in cheek. I am only true and honest when I say that I love this country.

Love the ones you’re with and be loved in return.